I was listening to a podcast that advocated “going to the happy place.” Gabrielle Bernstein calls it Tiki Time. Part of her prescription for happiness is thinking of those “joy moments” and going back to what it felt like. What did that contentment feel like when you were laying under a beautiful sky? Floating on the deck of a sailboat on a perfect current? Walking breezily with someone amazing by your side?
I started thinking: I don’t know what my joy moment is. I can’t think of a joy moment, I said, almost panicked! I can’t think of a time in recent years where I haven’t been bogged down by worry!
One moment comes to mind. Though one is not enough, this one was special. S. took me on a surprise adventure for my birthday the second month we were dating. We sat on the edge of a dock in Greenport, Long Island. He told me he loved me hours later, but I could tell both of us were thinking it in that moment.
I realized: I need more moments of joy. I also realized: I don’t need to do anything radical to achieve them. I just need to be. So Saturday, I became more conscious of my desire to have more moments of joy and that alone was enough to make those moments materialize.
We were going to a Wilco show. It’s S.’s favorite band and we’re gradually decorating our apartment with arty posters from each show we’ve attended together (with the exception of our first – anyone have the gig poster for the June 28, 2007 show at the Warsaw?) So, Saturday I woke up early and did some work. Some great work! Progress! Then we took a ride to Montclair, New Jersey and walked around. I did a little shopping (Something I haven’t done in a very long while. I tell myself I am saving shopping as a reward for when I finish my current manuscript.)
We went to a Cuban restaurant and I ordered (yes, I was the one who chose this…which is odd) bacon wrapped dates stuffed with sliced almonds! They were incredible. I ate three! We also brought a bottle of wine which they turned into sangria for us (very few liquor licenses in Montclair.)
Then we went to the show. Got a great place to stand. And enjoyed. The day was littered with joy moments. And I realized all I need to do to have more joy moments is decide to have more joy moments.
